Thursday, May 9, 2013

Hetero Bros

Holy shit. Why do I waste so much time thinking about "straight" guys? I'm not talking about my friends; I'm talking about hetero bros that I've never met or don't know well, that I have mancrushes on.

Like at the gym there are guys that I glance around for every time I go. There are some bros that go at more or less the same times as I go so there are plenty of familiar faces (arms, legs, asses). Many of these guys check me out, but most of them in a very hetero way. As in, they visibly look at what I'm doing but not in a sexual way, and usually only for short time. Whether or not they are consciously controlling this, I don't know. I know that for me, there are some dudes that I have to consciously not look at.
I'm apparently that douche that takes pictures of himself in the mirror
Yeah, it's douchey, but if I use a picture that someone else took of me it'd be much more identifying.

Anyways so there're a few of those bros who are kind of mutual hetero checkout buddies, and then there are the ones that I actually have some (probably twisted) hope that they are into guys. It ranges from bros that kind of give me a nonverbal "what's up" with a smile when we see each other, to guys that come up and actually introduce themselves. Like the other week, this guy made some little joke and then kind of introduced himself to me. He's a ginger, which isn't usually my thing, but he's actually good looking and has a very nice body. And I guess these bros are just trying to make friends with me? But dude: I don't want to be friends—I want to bang you.

This bro is not hetero

And then today this 6"3 brown-haired sexy-as-fuck dude was making random small talk with me. I was kind of in the zone today though so I didn't banter much back. Also, I had placed him in my mind as "definitely hetero", so manflirting didn't come into my mind as much.  And that made me I realized that I automatically mentally categorize bros into one of three categories: definitely hetero, definitely not hetero, and suspect. If you talk and interact with a guy, he likely quickly falls into one of the first two categories, but some guys are suspect and require a little…sleuthing to be sure.

I'm close to getting to the point of just fucking manflirting with these guys I'm into because I waste so much time considering these bros and whether they might be into dudes. If I just get right down to talking to them and feeling them out a little, I could save myself the re-pondering every time I see them. The other reason to do this is how the fuck do I know they aren't into dudes? Because they act just like me? How the fuck has that been my logic so far? And that's a really shitty prospect—missing out on a chill guy because I reverse stereotyped him. It's almost enough to actually follow through with this. Now, as I put it into words, it seems bold and chill so I think I'll do it.

This should at the very least be entertaining.


  1. Just download Jackd and grindr on your phone with an anonymous profile and see if any of the guys are on it when you're at the gym. Who knows. They might be on it anon too, or they might put up their own pics. Either way it doesn't hurt to try this too

  2. Sorry for being shallow and for my english (my native language is portuguese), but what amazing body you have. Look that abs. Can you put some advises like what you eat, your exercice rotine? And can we know how part of U.S you are?

  3. i'm completely the same way. there's guys at the gym that i practically have staring contests with. i do nothing about it though and just question in my head whether they are straight or not. i don't want to be that gay guy hitting on all the straight guys and making them feel uncomfortable but at the same time i swear they are checking me out. there's this one guy who's friggin perfect i see him in the library a lot and even then we make eye contact. he's got this nice set of slightly curly hair and the face of a greek statue. so friggin hot. anyway i catch him always glancing at me the last moment i pass by him...and then i kind of coordinate my workout to give me the best chances of passing by him to get water on my breaks in between sets. i soon realize that's insane and i try to reel myself back. however, i could avoid all of this guesswork and gym stalking if i did something besides staring at him...though that's an entirely different feat in itself. it'd be hard to make small talk when my mouth would be full of drool. I wouldn't want to be too obvious about my attraction either because if he wasn't into the dick then it would just creep him out. but then again who gives a fuck? if he's not gay and i do in fact have no chance with him...then why would i care if he thinks i'm a creep? anyway that's my life can be so dumb haha.

  4. Your body is, you know, ok.

    It's your brain that gives me a rock-hard boner.