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Tuesday, August 6, 2013

WTF II: I Ain't In Love

Bye Ry
(Previous: WTF Am I Doing: The Ryan Situation)

So we've definitely been trying to force shit. "Relationships are about compromise." Agreed, but to a point. And usually the prerequisite is that "when two people are in love".

I ain't in love.

Ryan's friends—that whole life—are wrong for me. I already have close friends that I actually want to hang out with. I don't fucking like gay bars. I've tried to go with the flow, but it feels wrong.

I'm palming two worlds with minimal bridges between them. I've tried to get comfortable in the gay world, but it doesn't fit me. It makes me question myself: am I even non hetero? Because none of this makes sense to me.

Ryan has made a big effort to try to be make me happy and content. And I like him. I do. But I think he's in love with me:

"I have a connection with you that I've never had with anyone else before"

I can't reciprocate that.

I'd like to stay friends but that will probably be impossible.

Did I see this coming? Yeah, kind of. But am I just wanted to be sure because this bro was close.

Oh well.


3 comments:

  1. Wow. You're really having issues with this. Wish I had some advice that I knew would help.
    I only recommend that you continue to talk about it. That helps me, anyway, to talk it out with others. You seem the independent type...no one is going to tell you what to do, but maybe just talking it out clears up your mind.

    Let us know what you decide.

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  2. Being into dudes doesn't have to be this complicated. I'm all for broadening your horizons or whatever, but you shouldn't have to force yourself to do shit you know you hate. And no one you're in a relationship with should ask you to do said things you hate. Yeah, relationships are about compromise but it's over stuff like one person wants to watch Sharknado and the other wants to watch Seinfeld reruns so you DVR Sharknado and watch it at a later time because you really need to be drunk or stoned to appreciate a piece of garbage like that anyway. That's compromise. You don't compromise yourself. You should be excited about finding other dudes who defy the stereotype, not frustrated because this dude is making you feel like you're becoming the stereotype. Shut it down

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There are some real gems here, in this comment

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