Wednesday, October 2, 2013

"I like guys, but not on Facebook"

Yes, I realize I'm the very first person to rag on FB and social media, but someone has to tackle this exotic beast.  And for the record, I social media isn't "ruling/destroying my life" because I rarely use it. It is weird to see the way, and how much, others use it though

Moderately interesting points that others have already covered:
    • Why does it seem like 99% of people on Facebook are smiling, "happy" and doing great at all times? Impossible. That's not how humans work.
    • Why do people think we want to see hundreds of pictures of their pets, kids and food? We don't. 
    • Facebook connects us? Meh
    • The protean manifold of overbearing "feeds" and the proliferating layers of advertising? Yeah brah, concur that they're hella chill. 
    • People sometimes create an altered persona for social media. Yep.
This last point is particularly relevant to NH-dom.

Most NHs overtime tend to progress toward being more open with friends, family and strangers about their affinity for dudebros. The "final frontier" in this "journey" is oddly sometimes a dude's social media profile/façade. Guys come out to friends and family; maybe they're even out at work, but traces of this remain minimal on their profiles. Even when dudes are dating, they'll often not post any pictures with, or of, their brofriend. It's hard to imagine a guy I really liked and wanted to introduce to my family, but didn't feel comfortable being associated with on OHHHhhhh social media. Shit's dumb.

And while my profile and pictures are admittedly very stereotypically hetero in appearance, albeit not frequently updated, I see no reason why I'd hide the my chill bro from the world. I do think it's obnoxious when any couple, hetero or otherwise, posts tons of pictures of each other, especially if it's PDA, but if you're ashamed to be seen with a guy in a picture online, that's a pretty bad sign. I'm not putting on a hetero show here.

Realistically people will just assume he's a friend, but whatever. That's a different issue.


  1. Nothing gets more likes from me than a photo of someone's kid eating pet food.

  2. Altough I'm not a big fan of fb - I'm a light user - my relationship status says Stof is my bf and there's a 'being together anniversary' . Duh, it's how it is, how can you keep silent about such a big part of your life... never had any negative comment (or comment at all) about it, although there has to be a lot of people who didn't figered that out when they meet me and can possibly see that afterwards when they're added as a friend. I guess only high school kids get bullied for such things...

  3. I tend to use FB mostly as a way to 1) support friends I have that are very a-social or awkwardly social (and thus are far more comfortable expressing themselves in written format than verbally face-to-face) and 2) keep in touch with friends who aren't local (I have a lot of friends out-of-state, and several out-of-country). My personal wall tends to only have links to articles I think are really cool or really important information for people to know.

    I have never posted a pet picture. I *have* posted pictures of animals and such I've taken, but it's things like the falcon that was hanging around my apartment complex one afternoon. I've also never mentioned the company I work for by name.

    But yeah, people are often overly-sterilized in online profiles. Seems to me to defeat the purpose. It's one thing to be cautious about employment, but another to be cautious about social things with people who are supposed to be friends.